When home feels like a battleground or a cold silence, it's hard to know where to start.
Nelson helps couples understand what has gone wrong, and gives them a way back to each other.
Couples come to Nelson for many reasons. Some are recovering from an affair or a breach of trust. Others keep having the same argument, or have drifted apart until they feel like flatmates rather than partners. For some, stress from parenting, work or family expectations has worn the relationship down. Others want to prepare well for marriage. You don't need to be in crisis to come. Many couples seek help early, before small hurts harden into distance.
Nelson uses the Gottman Method, an approach built on decades of research into what makes relationships last and what breaks them down. Counselling begins with an assessment. Nelson meets you together, and usually each of you alone, to understand your strengths as a couple as well as the patterns that hurt you. He then helps you change those patterns. You learn to manage conflict without wounding each other, to listen without defending, and to rebuild friendship and trust. With your consent, Nelson also brings prayer and Scripture into your sessions. Couples of any faith or none are welcome.
An affair can make both partners feel the ground has gone. Many couples do rebuild, but recovery takes time and a clear path. Nelson guides couples through three stages. We will work through Gottman's 3 steps/phases: Atonement, Attunement & Attachment. Atonement is the crucial first step of healing from betrayal where the offending partnertakes full responsibility, expresses deep remorse, and works to rebuild trust. Attunement (deepening emotional connection and understanding) and Attachment (rebuilding intimacy and bonding). You will rebuild closeness and trust, step by step, at a pace you both can manage. Nelson won't take sides. His role is to help both of you heal, whatever you decide about the future.
Strong marriages are built before the wedding day. Pre-marital counselling helps you talk about money, family, conflict, faith and expectations while things are calm. You'll leave with a shared language for the hard conversations ahead.
